Does it resonate? If it does, further question: why do you think you don’t deserve to be happy and to have peace of mind? LOL I am not your therapist, these are my questions in my early forties. Self-questioning my life and my patterns and behaviours CHANGED the rest of my quality time here.
After long questioning (self-analysis but you can do that with a therapist, it might go quicker!!), I know where my high standards come from. It was anchored in my childhood. Read more about how my daddy put me UNCONSCIOUSLY alot of pressure in my teenage in #ptsdmyjourneyofselfdiscovery.
He was (and still IS at 82) a great fan of olympic games and heros.
One of his fave books was filled with stories of greatest champions of the world of all times: Abebe Bikila, the Ethiopian marathon runner, Jim Thorpe, a Native American football player, and baseball player, among the most versatile in modern sports (he was stripped of his gold medals in 1913 after it was discovered he had violated amateur rules by being paid to play minor league baseball in 1909 and 1910) and many of Italian soccer players and bycicle riders from the 60s.
He was an amateur boxer and always blamed my grandmother to not let him become a great champion for whatever reasons. My dad has played the victim game all life through. Should we break this chain? Sure thing. Maybe all of my self-sabotage (and self-censoring) in my youth came from the BASIC fact that all I wanted as girl was to be SEEN and LOVED for who I am. With or without a medal. Does it resonate, soldier?
#olympicgames #pressure #guilt #guiltfree #goldenkeys #medagliadoro🏅 #lesclefsdor #expectationvsreality #parenting #selfquestioning✅✔ #selfcensoringforgreatergood #selfcensoring
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